Haunted
My recollection of her still hurts. Not because it is a painful recollection, no, there was no pain in that experience, atleast most of it. That was a journey laced with pleasure, with fertility and peace. It was a period of extremeley short days and excruciatingly long nights.
Nights that would be spent meditating, reading through the minutest details of the day. Waiting impatiently, longing nostalgically and praying desperately to be with her the following day. Visualising her enchanting smile, seing her mesmirising eyes and even hearing her charming voice...
The day would eventually come, though it would find me already awake, ready to breathe and baske in her affection. Toileteries done, I would dress up in my best available clothes and go out to meet her. I would have already made up my mind on what to say to her. In my mind, I would even hear her response to my compliments about beauty and love.
She would saunter towards me, in that majestic walk of hers. She always seemed so composed everytime. Me, I would be a bundle of nerves, unsuccesfully trying to appear nonchalant. My heart would be beating hard like a wild pigeon just captured. 'Why does this always happen?' I would ask and still be none the wiser. She would walk on in that self assured manner hardly noticing me.
But then she never noticed me, not as me anyway but as one of her pupils. 'Good morning class' she would say, the chorus with my voice the loudest would come back 'good morning madam!'.
I knew her greeting was directed at me, she just did not want everyone, in on our little secret. She would take off her jacket and sling it on the chair. My heart would pound even harder at the sight of her ample bossom and finely shaped arms. I would be droolling at her till the end of her period, by which time my notebook would be littered with tiny drawings of our wedding day and honeymoon and even our three kids.
Then my night would start... till day would break the following morning.
The day that it all came to head is indelibly written in my mind. Actually all our encounters are indelibly written in my mind. Like the time I skipped from the dormitories in the middle of the night to go and be with her. Pity I had not comunicated for I found her house locked and ended up being chased by her vicious dog. Or the other day I 'accidentally' entered her office and found her busy typing away on her laptop. She looked up and said, 'yes?'
I fumbled at my books, smiled stupidly and mumbled something along the lines of 'sorry madam, was going to the library'
'But that is on the other block' she said without even looking up.. I clumsily ambled away and think I heard her say 'idiot' although am sure it was directed at an email she had received.
It was then or rather during the long night that I decided to author the following note and ingeniously put it in my exercise book.
Dear Mrs Mapanza
I love you and you know I love you. You are all I think about everyday. The way you look at me, when you greet me. I want to marry you, and make you happy. I know you feel the same way. Don't worry about anything, love can conquer everything. Love knows no age, distance or job. God is on our side and God is love...
Ps: Don't woryy about that hideous rhino of a husband you have. You made a mistake and I don't hold it against you. I love you, you love me that is all that matters.
Always
It was to be two days after submitting our exercise books that things began to happen. During the two days I had smiled at her more profusely than ever and had made it a point to look straight in her eyes and assure her that I understood what she was feeling. For her part she just got on with her work and pretended not to notice me. This was perfectly understandable ofcourse, she was in love.
This day she came, and smiled at me. Disbeilivingly, I looked behind me to make sure the smile was not misdirected, but there was noone, my desk was the last one. She smiled again and this time with an unmistakable wink in her left eye. I smiled back, winked back and licked my lips like I had seen in the movies. As they say in the business, return it with interest.
She walked towards me, looked straight in my eyes, a gaze that I unflinchingly returned, tapped my head lightly with her fore-finger and returned to the front of the classroom. That act transformed me into a glowing ball of passion, love and ecstasy. My classmates were now looking at me with envy.
Shen pulled out a note from her pocket and without warning read out my love note to the whole class.
By the time she was ending, I prayed that the roof fall down on me and kill me, I did the next best thing and stormed out of class to go and pack my bags. I passed by the notice board on my way, only to find pupils clamouring to read a very interesting notice. My curiosity got the better of me, I pushed to the front to read the notice. To my utter dismay, copies of my love note were plastered all over the notice board.
The orange in my throat grew to choking size.
Years later I would be told, infatuation with teachers will only lead to your heart being broken. Snap out of it, he or she is way older than you.
Nights that would be spent meditating, reading through the minutest details of the day. Waiting impatiently, longing nostalgically and praying desperately to be with her the following day. Visualising her enchanting smile, seing her mesmirising eyes and even hearing her charming voice...
The day would eventually come, though it would find me already awake, ready to breathe and baske in her affection. Toileteries done, I would dress up in my best available clothes and go out to meet her. I would have already made up my mind on what to say to her. In my mind, I would even hear her response to my compliments about beauty and love.
She would saunter towards me, in that majestic walk of hers. She always seemed so composed everytime. Me, I would be a bundle of nerves, unsuccesfully trying to appear nonchalant. My heart would be beating hard like a wild pigeon just captured. 'Why does this always happen?' I would ask and still be none the wiser. She would walk on in that self assured manner hardly noticing me.
But then she never noticed me, not as me anyway but as one of her pupils. 'Good morning class' she would say, the chorus with my voice the loudest would come back 'good morning madam!'.
I knew her greeting was directed at me, she just did not want everyone, in on our little secret. She would take off her jacket and sling it on the chair. My heart would pound even harder at the sight of her ample bossom and finely shaped arms. I would be droolling at her till the end of her period, by which time my notebook would be littered with tiny drawings of our wedding day and honeymoon and even our three kids.
Then my night would start... till day would break the following morning.
The day that it all came to head is indelibly written in my mind. Actually all our encounters are indelibly written in my mind. Like the time I skipped from the dormitories in the middle of the night to go and be with her. Pity I had not comunicated for I found her house locked and ended up being chased by her vicious dog. Or the other day I 'accidentally' entered her office and found her busy typing away on her laptop. She looked up and said, 'yes?'
I fumbled at my books, smiled stupidly and mumbled something along the lines of 'sorry madam, was going to the library'
'But that is on the other block' she said without even looking up.. I clumsily ambled away and think I heard her say 'idiot' although am sure it was directed at an email she had received.
It was then or rather during the long night that I decided to author the following note and ingeniously put it in my exercise book.
Dear Mrs Mapanza
I love you and you know I love you. You are all I think about everyday. The way you look at me, when you greet me. I want to marry you, and make you happy. I know you feel the same way. Don't worry about anything, love can conquer everything. Love knows no age, distance or job. God is on our side and God is love...
Ps: Don't woryy about that hideous rhino of a husband you have. You made a mistake and I don't hold it against you. I love you, you love me that is all that matters.
Always
It was to be two days after submitting our exercise books that things began to happen. During the two days I had smiled at her more profusely than ever and had made it a point to look straight in her eyes and assure her that I understood what she was feeling. For her part she just got on with her work and pretended not to notice me. This was perfectly understandable ofcourse, she was in love.
This day she came, and smiled at me. Disbeilivingly, I looked behind me to make sure the smile was not misdirected, but there was noone, my desk was the last one. She smiled again and this time with an unmistakable wink in her left eye. I smiled back, winked back and licked my lips like I had seen in the movies. As they say in the business, return it with interest.
She walked towards me, looked straight in my eyes, a gaze that I unflinchingly returned, tapped my head lightly with her fore-finger and returned to the front of the classroom. That act transformed me into a glowing ball of passion, love and ecstasy. My classmates were now looking at me with envy.
Shen pulled out a note from her pocket and without warning read out my love note to the whole class.
By the time she was ending, I prayed that the roof fall down on me and kill me, I did the next best thing and stormed out of class to go and pack my bags. I passed by the notice board on my way, only to find pupils clamouring to read a very interesting notice. My curiosity got the better of me, I pushed to the front to read the notice. To my utter dismay, copies of my love note were plastered all over the notice board.
The orange in my throat grew to choking size.
Years later I would be told, infatuation with teachers will only lead to your heart being broken. Snap out of it, he or she is way older than you.
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